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#LivingQuell Stories: The Quell Pain Relief Device 8 Months Later

02/22/2018 • Jennifer Kilgore

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JKK 8 months

Hi, everyone. It’s been quite some time since I’ve shouted into the electronic void. I had such grand plans, too. At the end of 2015 I left my full-time job as an associate attorney. My bosses did so much for me, but the way our office was set up, having me work part-time just wasn’t possible. The month of December was my slow transition to working from home. I still have my freelance editing work, but primarily I am home. In my sweatpants. With my cat.

“The winter is harsh this year.”

I figured I would use this time to write a ton of blog posts, start my new website (to be formally announced at a later date), do yoga four times a day, walk an hour every day, finally go to the gym, hang out with my cat, wake up at 5 a.m. during the work week, do some personal writing for the first time in years, etc. I had grand, unrealistic plans. At the very least I still plan to discuss transitioning to working from home, but that’s not the point of this post.

This was my plan. It has not yet materialized.

So what kept me from my grand plans? All of you know the answer: indescribable pain.

I’d anticipated that upon returning home, my pain would get better. I had a doctor’s appointment near my old office about two weeks into January, so I swung by to say hello. My former coworkers all asked the same question: “Are you feeling better?”

I was surprised to realize that the answer was “No.” I wasn’t feeling better. If anything, I was feeling worse. I panicked and talked it over with my therapist. Was my job just a distraction and now I could focus on my pain all the time? Was the pain actually getting worse? Was I just whining endlessly? Was my catastrophic thinking compounding my agony? Was I weak and subconsciously wanted to take my meds so I could float all day, forever?

It took almost three weeks of internal reflection to realize what the difference was. When I figured it out, I felt really stupid. So stupid. Like, really stupid. I’m sure there’s more to it than this (unwinding for the first time in years, my body comprehending the fact I don’t have to sit at a desk 10 hours a day, and more), but the fundamental difference between my time working a full-time job and my time at home was that I had forgotten to wear my Quell device most days.

This illustrates the power of the Quell to me, though. I saw firsthand what happened when I forgot to wear it. The pain gained force like a hurricane, overwhelming me entirely. My hard medications, which I normally save for the evening, became a lifeline around noon. I blamed it on my unfamiliar new life, the fact that I was finally “relaxing,” and that I had fewer distractions.

Nope! I’m just an idiot.

I’m excited for new opportunities. I’m excited to keep reshaping my life. I’m also excited to take you on this journey with me.

This post has been edited for length. To read Jennifer’s full review, please visit her blog, Wear, Tear & Care.

About The Author
Jennifer Kilgore

Jennifer Kain Kilgore is an editor, writer, and attorney. She currently works as Attorney Editor for Enjuris.com, a personal injury law website that offers information for individuals who have been in accidents. She also blogs at WearTearandCare.com. When she has the time she works on her own projects, writing novels, literary nonfiction, and short stories. She is a graduate of Ohio University (B.S., Journalism, 2009, cum laude) and the New England School of Law (J.D., 2012).

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